I have been having a really shitty time lately. The change in my diet has caused my body a lot of pain. apart from the fact that I can no longer fit into my favourite jeans, I have acidity issues. It has taken over my life...the only thing I cooked since the brownies in my last was soup, mac n cheese, and tea. bahhh.
I am livid today though, because I want to talk about shit service, shit food, and shit prices!
I love good food (as is proven by my ill fitting jeans at the moment) and always, when you get into a new relationship, it revolves around sampling every eatery within reach. One year down the road (yay, for cupcake and I) and its our favourite hobby.
One thing my cupcake has not seemed to learn is that Java-Mombasa has shit food! I don't know why though because she is always complaining about shit food....?
I literally have five items I can vouch for...the cheesecake, the coffee, their wifi, the ambiance(if you turn a blind eye to the DEAD houseflies all over, like yea, we get it, effective way to get rid of flies, but can you sweep them off?? i feel like i am in a war torn flieraia or some shit) and their humongous take away iced tea cups (their iced tea is shit!! if you want it lemony, you pay extra lool.)
But somehow, we always find ourselves giving this place another chance. After bouts of food poisoning, soggy salads (the whole point of a salad is the crunchy freshness!! ), wrong orders and paying ksh. 600 for chapati, beans and boiled eggs in the name of huevos rancheros, I have legit had it.
The tortillas i had at breakfast were chapatis! I have had my fare share of tortillas because I love love love LOVE mexican food, and this defo tested like mama Kui's chapo madondo....because there was nothing mexican about my 'Mexican fried beans' they were tasteless, and bland.zero flavour...the only thing mexican about my plate was the salsa! I am so mad!
I take my food very seriously.....food should not give you food poisoning! and when you ask the management they are ever so kind to tell you that their kitchen is top notch....
If you cannot give your customers fresh food, do not serve it!!! i see you and your microwaved home fried potatoes....for shame!
let me not forget their fresh 'smoothies' that legit had two strawberries and a shit load of milk and sugar.
And the dead houseflies...dear Lord.
I have constantly been disappointed, and so have many of my friends...the manager and I have some sort of rapport where I shake my finger at him and he smiles in apology. but there is a new sheriff in town, and if our complaints (literally every time) are not been taken into consideration....i will give you a warning...if you want shit food, go to the naivas deli...at least its cheap....okay, that is being mean...but really, I have never had so much shit food than I have had at Java! and yet here I am, sipping on their coffee, as I use their wi-fi to blog about them
and the barristas are very nice and sweet...Its the chef i have a problem with! i will commend him/her on very lovely eggs. Loved my sunny side ups, might be the only thing they know how to make...and frying eggs is an unappreciated art
ta-ta
lola
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